Finding Fulfillment

This summer I went to a church camp in Panama City Beach, Florida called RYM (Reformed Youth Ministries).  At the camp, of course we get to play games and have fun, but one of the requirements is to choose two seminars to attend for the week.  One of the seminars I chose was called "Dating."  A few days after writing my first blog post, I started thinking back to that seminar and decided I wanted to hear the lessons again.  I was actually able to find the sermons online and decided to use them for my research.  They were taught by a man named John Stone who is an RUF (Reformed University Fellowship) coordinator for several colleges.  I was surprised to find that he had given many speeches about this topic in numerous places. When I went back and listened to them, I remembered a lot of what he had taught, but I was still shocked to hear it a second time.  So now, I guess I'll be looking at my topic from a Christian perspective.  The podcast I listened to basically answered several of the questions that I didn't think would be possible to answer.

To start things off, the big question of "why do we love?" was one of the first things he addressed.  Stone explained how we are born with a desire to be with someone and to be in love.  As much as we want to believe that that desire we have will be fulfilled by a spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc, we are wrong.  Only one thing can satisfy our desire, and that is God.  After Stone said that, I let that sink in for a little bit and thought about how true that really is.  I think it makes complete sense.  It is that "want" that we have inside of us that pushes us through and gives us hope that we will find someone to love us.  It is comforting to know that what we have been looking for has been right there all along.

Even though I feel comforted in knowing this, I have new questions that have formed since hearing this.  If all we need is God, then why should we still search for our other half?  One of the things that John Stone said in his lesson that stood out to me was, "Women tend to love but not respect.  Men tend to respect but not love."  Those words have been on repeat over and over again in my head.  I think I understand what he means behind it, but I'm not entirely sure and I'm wondering if it applies to my life.

Listening to Stone's lessons won't change anyone's mind about wanting to find a physical and visible person to love and be with, but hearing what he has to say can help them with their motive.  If your motive behind wanting to find someone to love is because you feel empty inside, then you aren't going to find success.  Stone said that you will actually end up tearing each other down in the process of trying to find yourself in that person.  If you want real fulfillment, you are going to have to find that in Christ.

Why Love?

People say your best thinking comes as the night gets later. I guess that's why I'm writing this at 1:00 in the morning. I'm awake and thinking about my topic anyways, so I might as well write my thoughts down. When you see the title you could interpret it in many different ways. The first few that jump into my head are: "why did I pick love?" "why do we need love?" and "why should love even matter?"  Of course I'm a teenage girl and so boys are on my mind most of the time. Instead making boys a distraction at school, why don't I make them a part of my schoolwork? My number one goal of this blog is to not sound like some stupid teenage girl who is boy crazy. I have legitimate questions about love that I want to explore. I'm sure a lot of the questions I have, adults have as well.

At my age, a lot of girls are already thinking of getting married, whether it's planning their wedding on Pinterest, wondering when they are going to find their Prince Charming, or trying to picture themselves with a guy for the rest of their life. After going through some tough boy troubles over the past year, I've started questioning my values and why love is so important to us as humans. Love puts us through both Heaven and Hell. Despite having my heart broken, I've begun to wonder is love really worth heartbreak?

After someone goes through a breakup, they most likely feel like they will never love again.  Typically though, that feeling is false. More times than not, that person will find someone else.  But why do people put themselves back into vulnerable situations? Do they not realize that they could easily go back into the deep pit they were in before? What gives a person hope that they won't get hurt again? In my case, why should I risk getting hurt again?

I admit to being a very emotional person. An idea as to how emotional I am: I just cried at the last football game. I do not play football, cheer, or play in the band. I just cried because I'm emotional.  Because of this, I have a fear of being hurt. I would say I just have to be taught once and I learn my lesson, but that isn't always true.  So what makes this time different?  Everyday, I weigh my options as to whether going after another relationship is worth my time and energy again. I have to choose whether to live with regrets, or be thankful I didn't hurt my heart.

I wonder all the time if I have found the one I'm going to marry.  That is rather embarrassing to say, but I'll put it out there anyways. Statistics show that around 70% of people have met the person they're going to marry by the time they graduate high school. If that's true do I fall in that 70%? How can I be sure that that person is the one? 

I feel like the more questions I ask, the fewer answers I receive. I hope that by the end of this assignment, that by getting all my questions out, I'll find a few answers, but that those few answers will be well worth it.